I house sat for a friend, Ryan who has a dog, a big dog, a Great Pyrenees. He doesn’t smell too good, (the dog) and when he goes to the bathroom … you have to pick up something the size of a VW Beetle.

Dalmatians; Surprisingly Kinky

But that wasn’t the worst part of house-sitting. My wife and I felt like we were on vacation staying at my friend’s house so around 11:30 we got frisky. We slipped into my buddy’s king size bed and started to … nothing!

The dog sat there looking at us, and I couldn’t perform. He’s the size of an armoire for God’s sake! He didn’t just watch…he stared! And when I tried to grab his collar to take him out of the room, he growled like only a 200 pound dog can.

So we canceled our romance plans and went to sleep. Actually my wife went to sleep; I couldn’t sleep because the damn dog kept staring at me. I think he was daring me to try and have sex again.

I wonder what my friend Ryan does with the dog when he’s having sex? It’s got to bother him. Nothing should be staring at you during sex. Not dogs, not a parrot, not a peeping Tom, not a painting, not even your partner. It’s creepy! And a real “pet peeve” for me.